SEDIH AIHHH .

KEEP FAITH TO ALLAH !

long time no see huh ? my bad .. i'm sorry .. heuheeuu .. huaaa
sobsob . well . you know , spm result had announced a week ago . my result ...
heuheu ... hukhukkk .. so sad .
just ALLAH knows my feelings after all .
in front , i just keep my straight face but inner ..
i know my mother felt dissapointed .. my father too
but what can i do ? heuheuu ..
i'm pretending that i'm okay but in fact , there is no no . i can't ..
let me tell you my result okayy .. heuheuuu

SEJ - A+
BM - A+
MATH - A
QS - A+
SYA - A+
ARAB - A-
BI - B+
BIO - B+
FIZ - B
KIM - B
ADDMATH - B

truthly , i don't think my result is too bad . that's why i don't feel sad at the first place .
but , my mother's feeling had hurt . she put a lot of hope to me . she wanted to see me on stage but i didn't get to fulfill her wish . i'm sorry mom .
after that she kept compare my result to somebody else .. bla bla
i know it was my fault so , i don't blame my mom . she just frustrated about my result . heuheu .
i think my mom can accept it right now . for a million times , i'm sorry , mom .

with my 6 A's , i can apply for jpa-mara scholarship . getting it or not just wait for it . but then , my english . damn it . i got B+ . no wonder my grammar were messed up . at last , i can't apply it lahh . heuheuu .

fly to oversea is my dream . i'm really want it . but , it's just not my luck . maybe ALLAH put pause to my dream . i hope i can achieve my dream when the right time come . so , ABERDEEN or EDINBURGH or whatsoever i'll go , just wait for me . see you in the future .

keep my faith to ALLAH .

xoxo ~~

Admit .

MY FIRST AND EVER 'LOVE' .

 you wonder ? i wonder too . hahaa . who's the special one that i like huh ? the truth is .. no one . i'm lying ? yeah .. i hope like that too but ... no . you can say i'm not the normal one . well , i think my heart is too precious for me . love is just something that i can't describe . i think it's suck . i don't like the girlish , corny , mushy things . love is just too complicated for me to understand . it's just not the time for it yet . but .. of course there someone .. ermm .. not someone maybe . people i should say . there are people that i like , adore , admire but not love . love and like are different things for me . love is just too deep . like yeahh .. simple one . let me tell you .

 no 1 . Baekhyun . he is the first one that i like . but he dumped me for Taeyeon . so sadd . i was shocked when i knew it . well , since he is the first one so , i'm always on his side . right now , he is a different person from the first i know him . after the scandal leaked , many people bashed him . so do i . Baekhyun and Taeyeon are not the right one . yeah .. you can call me the immature fan but it is just not right . it's not because i'm jealous or what . i just want that someone is suitable for him . i ship anyone with him as long as she is younger than him . sorry baekhyun-ah . i know you are not you now . maybe because of the scandal or Exo members ' leaving , Yi Fan and Lu Han . but , i want you to know , i'm always support you . i hope i can see the old you who's always be the bubbly and humble . kkaebsong ~

 no 2 . Seokjin aka Jin . i'm crushing on him right now . i can't resist his cuteness although he is the oldest in BTS . he likes pink and his nickname is pink princess . i don't care because he likes mario's collection . this is showed his manly side . he is very good in cooking . how can i'm not like the man that can cook ? i hope one day , he can cook for me . hehehh . what an imagine huh ? yeahhh , haruman ~

 no 3 . Jaebum aka JB . i know him for a few month . he is my bias afterall when i start to like Got7 . at first , i don't like Got7 but yeah .. lets say miracle had happened and i start to treasure them a lot . you know , JB has the smile eyes . it's very cute when he smile . i love to see his smile . gimme ur smile juseyo ~

 no 4 . Leo . to be honest , i don't know Vixx very well but i love their songs very much . i think Leo is a mystery man . that's make me want to know him a lot . he's such a quiet idol . i wonder how about his life as an idol . in AS4U , the mcs teased him . his face turned red . he's a shy person . he feels shy when everyone pay attention to him . he's such kyeopta ~

 well .. i'm a normal person as you see . hahahh . i love them so much . heuheu ~

xoxo ~


#ripmyenglish

Random Thing .

NO HARD FEELING OKAYYY ..

 aku rasa macam nak cerita benda yang relate dengan aku malam ni .dah memang blog aku kan ? mestilah kaitan ngan aku . person .. yeah someone i know . kau pernah rasa dihargai dopp ? aku rasa sepanjang aku hidup ni , aku soulless . no feeling mehh . tapi kadang tu terasa la jugak . baru baru ni , that someone yang identiti terpaksa dirahsiakan had called me . yeah . someone tu never failed to call me or text me . oleh itu , terasa lah aku dihargai someone tu . hehehh . cliche ? dak aih . touche ahh . aku nak cakap aku happy lahh dengan someone tu sebab sepanjang perkenalan kami , we're such egomaniac . haaa . tapi kan .. bila dah nyembang , dia bukan nak cerita sangat pun kat aku . aku yang cerita banyak kat dia . kadang kadang sampai tadak topik pun nak cerita . aku ni pun bukan biasa sangat apa orang .. otp .. haa . akward gakk laa . tapi someone tu tetap call aku . hoho . last cakap aritu , dia asked me to say fighting words laa . terkejut derr . tapi memang aku balaih kata kata semangat la kat dia .. dalam perkataan . hahax . geli doh cakap seniri . XD

 another story .. memang dah bila bersama lama lama kita kenai character someone tu . ada la someone nii yang identiti dia terpaksa dirahsiakan jugak . aku tak buat kawan ramai pun sepanjang aku belajaq . tapi we're classmate for a long time . berapa lama tu takleh abaq laa . satgi tau pulak kan .. haa .. apa yang aku salute dia kan .. dia memang tau cara aku . dia pernah abaq kat aku sekali camni , ' hang ni aku tau pemalaih . keja sekolah memang tak siap selalu . tapi , kalau hang rajin tobat no1 dok kat hang . hang ni pandai tapi tak rajin , pemalaih . ' the rest is history ... lebih kurang camtu la ayat dia tapi aku olah sikit . bukan nak riak ka paa . tapi .. dia tau aku . dia tau aku camna . tu yang aku salute sunggoh . dia nampak aku camna . terharu gak laa . XD

 xoxo ~

On Mind

PERNAH TERFIKIR ?

 long time no see , huh ? it's time for me to talk to myself . my blog my diary my words my mind . i'm glad that someone who created this so called blog . ignore my broken english mehh . hoho . i'm trying . well , actually when i'm talking i like to use english . alone lahh . ngan orang lain memang tak lahh . i think english more accurate . as example , when we talk about feeling . ahakss . dah jadi minah jiwang ka paa . not my style okey .. betoi la tu . bahasa melayu macam umum . better english if that 'something' complicated . kk , drop the subject .

 failure ? everyone feel it even once in their lifes . complicated lahh . tukar tajuk plak . friends ? in school we meet our friends . in home we meet our family . in road we meet our strangers . our strangers ? it's so wrong . subject change . studies ? right now i'm doing nothing . mean i had finished my studies for high school . miss ? . change the subject please . partner ? are you kidding me ? not right time laa . tukar tajuk lagi . kk , for the last question .. hard feelings ? for someone ? drop the subject now .

 in conclusion , not all questions have the answers . think first before asking and think first before answering . you know .. i'm writing this without thinking first but the result .. ermmm .. not bad . usually , when i plan something , it is never happen . so , i should stop for planning . i should just follow the flow , huh ? let me think first .. well . you think ?

 xoxo ~

LIFE . part III

HATI .. DIFFICULT THING .

 gimme gimme gimme ur love .... make me make me make me ur man .... err ? ur girl maybe .. well . lagu kann ? tak tahu . gi search Got7 - Gimme .. hati main topic for today . maybe .. for a long time , i don't know . difficult thing for me . i don't understand myself . not completely . petty ? pathetic ? told me . don't pretend you understand me , know me completely because even i don't understand myself . apa aku ngarut tuhh .. well . luaran .. ignorance , innocent , like a kid ? don't expect me . rude , brat , annoying ? yeah . that's me . frankly said , a true badass . well , don't judge a book by its cover . don't ever try to mess up with me .

 info tambahan for today , my ideal type . tak semua orang dapat apa yang dia nak kan ? aku lahh tu . imagine is my hobby . sbb apa ? berangan bukan jenayah . first of all , , someone looked nice in long sleeve t-shirt and jean and also sneakers - aku suka . tall - i'm clingy type . smiley eyes - aku suka . can impress me everyday  - aku cepat boring . kalaupun drama tu ada hero hensem , ulang pun aku takkan tengok dah . well , that's me . okeyy . tu lahh ideal type aku . so anyone ? sapa aku suka , aku punya suka lahh . hati aku hanya aku and ALLAH sahaja yang mengetahui .

xoxo ~

LIFE . part II

PERSONALITIKU ... SHUT UP AHH !

 well .. kemarin aku cakap nak cari web quizilla to know about my personality . disebabkan 5 tahun 5 bulan , aku teringin nak try jugak and kemarin aku eja quidzilla kan ? bila aku taip quidzilla tak dop ahh . qupanya aku silap eja . okeyy . sorry . my bad ..patah balik kepada 5 tahun 5 bulan , nak tau cerita pa p cari kat kedai buku . tu novel Hlovate . my favourite writer . bahasa santai .. basah .. i like . guess what ? aku dah tangkap cintan ngan mamat backstreet dalam Tunas . sapa lagi .. Benz Alif Sulaiman . kata si Addin suku kerabat mafia . hehhhehh . taste aku memang kena betoi ngan Benz . nasib baik aku tak sangkut ngan Along Serbia . tapi disebabkan Ana ngan Along , aku teringin nak pergi Aberdeen . doakan aku dapat ke sana . Amin . hehh . tu semua karakter yang si Hlovate create . tapi aku rasa depa semua tu memang hidup betoi ahh . next novel from Hlovate , wait for me yeahh ..

 balik pada quizilla .. result dia dah ada . aku tak qeti nak cerita satu satu dia punya soklan kuiz tu macam yang Ana buat . aku english pun teraboq ntahhapapa . like i care , huh ? janji aku belajaq tuk jadi terer . hahax .. kalau nak tau soklan pa sila lah lawat quizilla.com . kalau tak keluaq jugak pandai pandai la taip bagi betoi keluaq page dia . kalau tak silap aku result aku sama macam Ana .

YOU'RE TAMMY.

Your friends think you have things all figured out, but on the inside, you're just as confused as everyone else. You have a practical, hard-working side, but sometimes you'd rather just follow your heart. Adults probably like you because you're smart and you've got goals... but lately, one of your main goals is to lighten up and have more fun. After all, you're only young once!

 baca lahh . pandai pandai la paham seniri . aku nak terang pun tak berapa nak qeti . tapi tang bab adults probably like you ... ermmm . mertua ? ahahh . joke kk . muda lagi . jujurnya , aku tak berapa nak paham lahh . nanti aku baca banyak banyak kali bagi paham . ermmm ..

xoxo ~

LIFE .

TARAPAPAPAA ..

 tik tok tik tok .. well . rajen pulak aku la ni nak post entry kan ? jobless meh lagipun kepala berselirat dengan macam macam benda . dah kalah menteri kat jabatan dopp . asalnya sekarang pa masalah aku ? benda pa yang aku dok fikir ahh ? aku rasa la ni aku dok umah and doing nothing ... dah tu apa yang serabut pala otak ..

 potassium cyanide . petua tangan kiri fleming . E=mc^squared . rindu belajaq paa .. otak dah biol ahh . aku dah taip merapu meraban . sebenaqnya aku bukan jenis yang outspoken . this is my way to spill out what i feel . aku dah rasa nak underground ahh . ehhh . bukan putus nafas kk . aku nak perubahan . i need new place . ahakss . perubahan yang lebih baik . propanol betoi . aku meraban pa nihh . agak agak kuiz personaliti quidzilla ada dak lagi ? nak try .. tapi lain kali laa aku cari .

 metallica best dop ? teringin nak pergi gig . fikiran luaq alam betoi . mana nak cari benda tu . sekarang aku tengah rajen tapi tadak pa nak buat . someone please amik aku qeja . tobat aku jadi pekerja terbaik seantero alam . kk . otak set bagi center sikit . stop taip benda langkah benua boleh dakk ? well . talk to my head .

 amacam entry ? mesti kau fikir aku dah tertelan potassium cyanide . well . benda tu racun tikus actually . hehh . la ni angin aku awan komolunimbus ahh . tak betoi sikit . hate me yeah .. kau tengok tajuk atas .. apa aku tulis ? tarapapapaa .. so .. that is my entry . thanks kepada kau yang membaca .

xoxo ~

KEHIDUPAN .. part II

RAGAM OR ... 

 sambungan or bab baru ? well .. random stuff maybe . i lebih suka bab story mory benda yang i tengah terfikir sekarang . but .. i feel kinda clueless right now . too much thinking . ermmm .. just now , i read one article about kpop artists and malay girls hugged . what the heck ? arghhh . it was a viral since yesterday and i knew all about it just a minute ago . not really laa . dari pagi tadi kot aku tau but malas nak cari . internet on the phone dah baik aku campak fon aku langkah benua sampai laut merah jawabnyaa . ngalahkan siput sedut nunggu nak keluar page dya pun . back to story .. hugged ? ermm .. benda fes aku terfikir masa keluar video tu kat wall facebook .. sapa arr artis tu ? alaa .. muka tak nampak la pulak .. blame me yeah .. dah aku pun peminat , mesti la nak tau sapa artis tu .. carik punya carik .. B1A4 rupanyaa . well . myself said to those malay girls yang ber 'hug' ber 'kiss' segala .. "B1A4 ja kot" . kalau BTS .. entry ni dah tadak kot kes aku dah terhumban lappy ni masuk bawah bantal . ehehh . gila kau nak main campak campak jaa .

 kita masuk mode serius pulak . bab melayu ni semestinya berkait dengan Islam . minat tu minat jugak . tapi kalau sampai hukum pun dah tolak tepi . tepuk dada tanya iman , tanya akal , tanya diri sendiri lah kan . sikit dah punya besar panjang takkan nak kena bagi pencerahan pakai spotlight pulak kot . well . easy for me to say .. as a fan .. i'm not at their places . macam mana kalau aku yang at their places .. atas pentas berdepan dengan idols tu semua .. ermmm . memang takkan ada lah aku kat tempat depa nyaa . ingat duit banyak sangat nak beli tiket semua tu . ehehh . so , aku memang takkan merasa experience camtu lah senang cerita .

 netizen Malaysia ni memang bash abih la pasai kes ni . tapi kalau artis melayu yang berlakon peluk kiss bagai yang terang tang tang sesama Islam tu macam mana pulak eh ? takmau bash pulak ke beramai ramai ? 

hate me cause i hate malay dramas .. sebab apa ? well , it sucks .

xoxo ~

Kehidupan ..

Tersingkap semula ...

 tahun dah masuk 2015 . umoq pun dah bertambah . sekolah pun dah sudahh . hate to admit it but yess .. i miss school damn much . i'm dying at home now . hurghh ! know what ? i miss everything about school and hostel . tell me who doesn't miss that time . mai aku p tumbok sekali . even ego kau setinggi gunung everest sekalipun , deep in your heart , you still miss all those time . kalau ego kau masih menebal pun , you miss your friends right ? kalau still tanak ngaku pun , mesti kau rindu masa yang best best jadi kat hostel kann .. told you ...

 truthly , i'm a bit regret about my study life . aku rasa macam nak patah balik masa aku darjah enam dulu . aku nak pilih sekolah yang mana aku tak satu sekolah dengan mak aku . you know what .. i want to feel some freedom .. something like no one know me . bukan nak kata aku famous or what .. but yeah .. bila aku buat something orang takde nak kait kan aku dengan sesapa . arghhh! cena nak kata .. i'm just want to be myself . i think i can do something yang orang tak jangka aku boleh buat bila aku berada di kalangan orang yang tak kenal aku . maybe i can do that ... yeah ... no one never know .. talk to myself and set in my mind .. let bygone be bygone .. 

 aku baru punggah and terjumpa one book yang memang feveret aku . Tunas . i should not said that word at the first place ..'regret' .. perancangan Allah adalah sebaik baik rancangan . yeah .. i just wish my study life be like Tunas . aku baca Tunas pun dah keberapakalintah . kali terakhir aku baca rasanya masa abih form 3 . time tu memang gila novel .. so aku pun tak baca balik Tunas time tu . Tunas ni lain dari novel lain yang aku pernah baca sebab it's about student life . no chessy no corny no mussyy .. no lovey dovey .. senang kata tak macam novel novel yang lain . serius cakap . aku meluat drama melayu .it sucks . hate me cause you know me i'm a korean lover .. hell yeah .. like i care ..

 i want to tell more .. but maybe next time . you know life is mystery . we never know what is upon us . maybe i come with new story or just continue with this speaking story lalala .. or never comeback . yeah .. no one never know .. wrap up for this entry .. never regret for what we had but regret for what we never achieve as long as we live .

xoxo ~